He’s leaving again. Only three weeks this time and it will go quickly for him, he’ll be very busy. But tonight as I sit here not wanting to go to bed so tomorrow doesn’t come just quite yet I don’t care how fast or slow it goes, I am realizing I just don’t want him to go. We have to be grownups and sacrificial and understand that sometimes we have to fore-go what we want now for a better life but every now and then I catch glimpses of the not-so-grownup me inside that just wants to cry and wail and demand this not be so. I realized sometime this week that he will be gone more than he will be home this next year and suddenly the air goes out of the room. By the time he’s back for good, Doodle will be turning 4 and we’ll be planning ZuZu’s 2nd birthday party. It’s those moments that I fear we’ve made a terrible mistake. But I have embraced the British way: Keep Calm Carry On. And I am very good at it.